Taking a leap of faith in love, Because he is far from perfect… But his heart is good.
I’ve been hurt over and over before, From something that was said to be love… But it was delivered from a heart that had gone rancid.
But how do I know that good won’t go rancid this time, too? I can’t know, I can only trust. And trust is like faith with a parachute.
Do parachutes fail like people do? Will this man catch me when I start my trust fall of marriage once again? Will his arms be there, or will my parachute be there just in case he isn’t?
What if he doesn’t catch me? What if he turns away? What if he gets weary and gives up?
Having caught his prize, what if he grows complacent? What if he gets lazy and lets addiction take over? What if his moral stake that has weakened at times bends and he allows it to creep in again?
I don’t think I can bear it again. My scars are so deep. Old and new, my scars will break wide open, and I will bleed out.
Can I trust when addictive tendencies are there? Not in my human mind, only with Jesus. But it still gets down to trust.
Jesus transforms hearts and minds. Jesus overcomes addiction, and my sins too. Jesus shows me that his heart is love.
Jesus is love, and love conquers all, So is love all that I need to trust? I never knew unconditional love, though, so how do I do that?
No wonder trust is so hard! I have a heart that IS love, but I didn’t love myself. And it takes love to trust.
Faith, hope and love are the three, But where does trust fit in? Trust lies in all three.
Imagine a trust fall. Arms out, eyes closed, we let ourselves fall backward. Complete surrender to trust that we will be caught.
We must have faith that our partner will catch us, right? Hope that we have searched the depths of our partner’s heart to get rid of every ounce of sin and that we bolted the doors shut to Satan. With love in our heart, our hope turns to a prayer and faith that good will overpower evil and defeat addiction.
So we trust. We fall into the arms of marriage, for the first time or for the last. And then… we will either fly or fall to our death.
But I fell to my death last time! Except… I didn’t hit the ground, Because Jesus was my parachute.
I had almost forgotten that I had a parachute. But I saw my way to escape death and I pulled the cord. Just in time, I put my trust in my parachute.
If Jesus caught me before, then surely he will again. Except this time, I need to do my trust fall into Jesus arms in the first place. My perspective needs to be aligned right… God’s way is best.
So I will become one with my partner, and together we will stand at the edge of this steep cliff. Arms out, eyes closed, we will fall backwards together. With complete surrender that Jesus has us both.
When you start a marriage on Christ, You have to have a different perspective than the world does. My scars, our sins, and his addictions brought together as one.
Healed and covered by Jesus, we will trust fall together, Trusting that we have been given an upgraded parachute to match our surrendered faith. So we fall back, hand in hand, and we soar… together.
Only Jesus and peace.